I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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