If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
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New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
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I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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