Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize