ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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