There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
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Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
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Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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