it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
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Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
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threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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