I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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