Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
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he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
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