You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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