yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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