i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
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