There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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