she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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