Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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