I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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