I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
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