This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
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