it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize