I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pee around me
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize