In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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