Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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