So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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