He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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