So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
either way he was missing a nipple.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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