My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
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