i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize