so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about my life...
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize