i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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