Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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