that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
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The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
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I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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