Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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