I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize