omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Randomize