and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
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I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Boobs are out for the taking
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The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
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