Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Lo siento on account of my penis...
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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