dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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