she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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