you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
no you cant smoke seaweed
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
try to milk me bitch
Help. Why am I so naked?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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