it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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