dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i think my mom watched the whole time
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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