and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
accomplished twins. life is a go
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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