it was like his penis was on wheels.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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