just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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