She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize