Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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