he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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