your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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