I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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