just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize