just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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